Back from the dead... COMPLETE THE STORY!!! :O

Right... who wants to play a good, clean (hopefully) game of Complete the Story? And this time, let's keep it PG-rated. Or maybe PG-13.

I'll start:
It was a cold and blustery day, and Oscar Wilde was out getting his daily supply of wood chips.

But, little did he know, Chuck Norris was driving his Ferrari recklessly through the forest, and just as Oscar had finally gotten enough wood chips, he was ran over!!!

"Did you hear something crack?" asked Chuck Norris, addressing Mr. T, who was in the passenger seat of the Ferrari.
"That was just me cracking my knuckles, fool," replied Mr. T.

Chuck Norris, who didn't like being called "fool", kicked Mr. T's @$$ and stole the house that he made out of toothpicks and glue.

But, Mr. T, not wanting to be undone, took his cup of Pepsi and angrily chucked (pun fully intended) it at Chuck Norris, temporarily blinding him.
A group of squirrels, smelling the scent combination of Pepsi and wood, flew out of the woods in which they resided and attacked Chuck Norris. Rather than biting his face off, the squirrels instead attacked his pants, eventually stealing a box of mints from his pocket.

Chuck Norris, outraged by the theft of his mints, picked up Mr. T and hurled him like a spear at the squirrels. Thus, impaleing 5 squirrels, 3 pigeons and an old lady who happened to be walking by.

Mr. T was uninjured, thanks to his large and fluffy mohawk. Instead of attacking Chuck Norris again, he went off into the woods to share some mints with the surviving squirrels.
Confused by the sudden, unmanly turn of events, Chuck Norris scratched his head. It was at this time that a half beat-up Oscar Wilde drove by in Chuck Norris' Ferarri. "A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies!*" he screamed at Chuck Norris.

*Actual Oscar Wilde quote

But Mr. T DOESN"T have an afro!!! He has a flat Mohock!!! And the squirrels, realizing they had been decieved, attacked Mr. T!!!!

Little do you know that Chuck Norris and Mr. T are lovers! And with the fiery power of their love they incenerated the squirrels and any afros that they may or may not have had.

Dr. B wrote:But Mr. T DOESN"T have an afro!!! He has a flat Mohock!!! And the squirrels, realizing they had been decieved, attacked Mr. T!!!!

You idiot. I did put mohawk.

Here we go again... sickness.

Anyway, back to the story:
Then that Torch guy from the Fantastic Four appeared and torched all the hopeless losers sitting at home writing stories about gay guys.

:phoenixwright: You speak of lies and deciet!!!! If you really did put "Mohawk" then I would've just copied your spelling instead of putting "Mohock"!!! Once again, my lack of proper spelling has proved me right!!!! :clap: Thank you, Thank you!

:phoenixwright: Your face!

Shall we continue with the story?

No, Your face! ...burn... oh yeah.

Erm... we're getting off topic... so maybe you should continue the story...

(and it's YOUR face)

:phoenixwright: Shouted Chuck Norris as he quickly found out that he had been on a reality TV show this entire time.

"That's not in the script," said the director.

"I pity the script... and the fool!" Shouted Mr. T as he tore the director to shreds.

And so, Oscar Wilde wrote a better script.

When the script was finished, Chuck Norris decided not to be a part of it. So, they hired Tom Cruise to play his part.

Unfortunately, Tom Cruise did not know to how roundhouse-kick anything.

So they hired Jackie Chan as a stunt-double.

And so Tom Cruise had to dye his hair black for the sake of consistency.